Honest trailer, pirate101
by blevinp
Summary: This is an honest trailer for pirate101! I DO NOT OWN PIRATE101 OR HONEST TRAILERS! (Pirate101 was made by KingsIsle and Honest trailers were made by youtube stars, Screen Junkies). Hope you enjoy!


The following trailer is rated H for honest

From the company that likes to make our lives feel dull compared their RPG's, comes a new game that has wizard101 fans believe Kingsisle has just changed the script a bit just to make a ton of money, Pirate101!

Welcome to the spiral reborn, which will make you think that the game is set around the 18th (and 16th) century, but it will fool you because of 20 and 21st century ideas and inventions like:

A lemonade stand

Fireworks

Space travel

Talking animals

Robots

Puppet shows

orphanage

Being "the choosen one"

Training pets

Presents at Christmas time

And more f***ing magic!

Batten down the hatches in this game full of parity goodness, although you constantly have to remind yourself that the only way KingsIlse gets most of it's ideas off a Spanish textbook, including references like...

*Plays dramatic music*

El Toro from the Spanish movie, Zoro

Monquistadors from the Spanish army, Conquistadors

Gortez, from the Spanish leader, Cortes

Marco Polo _(I think that's how it's spelled)_ (Great explorer of the spiral) from the Spanish explorer, Marco Polo

El Dorado, "lost island of solid gold", says Captain Avery, originated from the Spanish belief of El Dorado

When Gortez talked about the death of past civilizations, it refereed to the Aztec, Inca and/or Maya

 **Might as well let KingsIsle base their next game on Wikipedia, or whatever!**

Welcome to the spiral. a magical world where anything is possible if you believe. This might include the following: Breathing underwater for a really long period of time, having a zombie remember it served your parents when it clearly has no brain, water-less oceans, a magic lamp with no genie inside it, being able to grant your three wishes though, being able to live inside a living whale, being able to hit someone far away with a short sword without throwing it (just get something with sniper shot, grab a sword/gun weapon, and test it out. It's super crazy and unrealistic), and being able to fire a bullet out of a gun without pulling a trigger.

Journey to skull island, a pirate's hideout where death and pain are impossible to come by with any type of weapon you can think of, such as swords, knives, guns, hammers and magical death wands! Where the only way to die are if a mutinous rat caption poisons your food, or if you type yohoho on the pirate selection screen resulting in your one of your most innocent pirates to not take vengeance on an evil robot that murdered their parents who must be stopped from destroying multiple worlds (whoops spoiler alert).

To make matters worse, KingsIsle will make you think your character is a robot as well! It never talks, has feelings, eats, sleeps, they were generated by a computer, and is run by someone else other than themselves. Is it too late to mention that THEY NEVER ACTUALLY TALK? Why is that?

Enter a brand new game, which consists of four currencies that are completely stupid way. There's gold, the small amounts you get from large chests and the most from small chests. Crowns, which you clearly don't need in order to buy good equipment and other stuff unlike Wizard101. Script, the currency that looks like _Monopoly_ money more than actual money. And finally, the most used, favors, in which the entire world evolves around the big decision to determine if you're lazy enough to give a f*** about the problems of other people.

Not to mention other than completely mind blown, kingsisle will have us asking questions we desperately seek answers to, like, "Why the dinky little backpacks again, kingsisle!" and "If pirate101 and wizard101 have almost the same worlds, why can't wizards see pirates?" and "How is the water in the life fountain not contaminated and keeps having an unlimited supply of drinkable water?" and "Why are some worlds always nighttime, and others it's always daytime?" and last, but not least, "Which animals can talk and which ones can't?"

Starring...

Captain Avery-18th century man

The Commodore-18th century dog

Madame Vadima-18th century woman

Morgan Lafitte-18th century raccoon

Mordekai-18th century century shark

Ol' Fish Eye-18th century pelican

Blind Mew-18th century cat

Bonnie Anne-18th century fox

Old Scratch-18th century skeleton

Gortez-The combination of Donkey Kong and Hulk

Also NOT starring these worlds...

Wizard City

Krokotopia

Dragonsypre

Polaris

Darkmore

In,

 **How to properly steal ideas from history, like a pirate!**

See, this is what happens when you don't leave Spain, Spain! (I took (stole) this line from the honest trailer of street fighter, and changed it slightly. Yohoho or something)

* * *

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed, and leave a comment! Thanks


End file.
